Thursday, July 5, 2012

HOW TO BE PRESIDENT IN A TIME OF CRISES

God knows why he makes people what He makes them. We do not choose; we cannot complain. Some people he made to peddle ‘okpa alele’ in Somolu; and others he carved out of wood to become president. Even Farouk Lawan, whose evidence room is full of dollars, is it not a trial from God that he is facing? Nigerians don’t understand this: they keep hassling you and complaining as if being president was your idea in the first place.

You are doing the best you can to run this country, God knows. I don’t mean to tell you what to do, but consider these reminders on just how you must continue to govern this nation.

Because you are Nigeria’s chief representative, you must make trips. They are important and you must let nothing stop you from making these trips, especially if you are going to nice sunny countries like Brazil with nice clean beaches. You must go even if two or three states are grinding to a halt because of explosions and violence. The thing is, if you cut short your trip because some miscreants with bombs are terrorising people, everyone will think you are afraid of them.

You may not be a lion or general, but no, you are not afraid of them. So, let them bomb; let people retaliate. After all, a prophet is not loved in his own home not so? If not, why do they keep inviting you around the world to give keynote speeches? And here at home, every Tomilewa, Dike and Haruna thinks they can insult you and your loving wife. (And ehen, about that, the rumours about her ‘receiving gifts’ from governors and their wives when she travels are totally baseless. She is a child of God. God will judge harshly those spreading hurtful rumours.)

And these trips, you see, they are an avenue to make a statement of how great and populous we are. People criticise you and compare your robust entourage to the embarrassingly small one of the Prime Minister of Britain. Ignorant people! How many people are in Britain? How can you compare over 160 million communal people to 62 million individualistic people? They don’t care about each other - that is why somebody can die in an apartment and not be missed for 3 years. Here, we care about each other and we care about our president enough to have 100 plus people follow him on an official trip.

There are many wicked people in this country. They may know that prior to your swearing in, you submitted an asset declaration form to the Code of Conduct Bureau, but they will still ask that you publicly declare your assets. What is it that they want from you? Do they want kidnappers to start following your children? God will judge them. You must let them know, you don’t give a damn about any public declaration. Yes people like Obama can go on air and be declaring things and even telling Americans what he weighs and if he has quit smoking or not. That is his business; no wonder these days small countries like Iran can even snub America.

You are a strong president and you will not give in to these wicked people. After all, is it public declaration of assets that will fix electricity and build roads? Will telling Nigerians what you own put food on their tables? It is all the fault of that your ex-boss who made you do it in the first place, God rest his soul. If he had not ignored your advice and gone to declare to Nigerians what doesn’t concern them, would these wicked people have been asking you to do it now?

One thing you must never do, Your Excellency, is actually take responsibility for the mess that happens in your government. Why should you? Are you the one who is stealing pension funds, stealing oil money, bombing churches? You do not need to come on air and say, our government has let the people down. No need to apologise at all. Worst case scenario, sack some people. If anyone is not happy with that well, they can go chew on agbalumo.

God is happy with you and that is all that matters. People just need to wait a few years to see how this government will transform their lives. And no, you are not thinking of 2015 yet; it is too early to do that. But you know how God does his things. Anything can happen.

Till then your Excellency, I wish you safe flights as you represent Nigeria across the globe. God bless your hustle!

1 comment:

  1. Also, Mr. President, the problem of power, insecurity, corruption, bad roads, poor health care and rubbish education did not start in your administration, why are people blaming you for it? Imagine, poverty has been in Nigeria since Shagari, you have only helped to institutionalize it. Corruption has been a mainstay in Nigeria since, well, forever. You have just made it front page. Boko Haram has been in Nigeria since Obansanjo, why are they blaming you for it? Anyone who is not happy with your handwork, excellent speech, smashing wife, (erm) and lovely oil ministress, god will judge them harshly.

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You fit vex, bet abeg no curse me. You hear?